"A hot winded pacifist" -Victoria Schell Wolf

Friday, December 25, 2009

To Catch a Thief

Dear Prof. HotWind,

-excerpt-

LONDON – For a priest in northern England, the commandment that dictates "thou shalt not steal" isn't exactly written in stone. The Rev. Tim Jones caused uproar by telling his congregation that it is sometimes acceptable for desperate people to shoplift — as long as they do it at large national chain stores, rather than small, family businesses.

-comment-

Apparently, our online bible scholar has a little competition. Talk about drifting from what you hold true, in a sometimes acceptable manner. We all thought George Carlin was just being funny when he said, “Sometimes the church grants dispensation”. Man, he would have a field day this. I would like some insight on the good Reverend’s twenty first century view on the coveting of thy neighbor’s wife.

We need to reset for a moment. The Reverend isn’t throwing out a blessing to would be thieves. His sermon is a reminder that we need to help our brother in his time of need; turn a blind in a manner of speaking. Other religious factions sanction the taking of life in HIS name. We’re only talking about a loaf of bread here, not a beheading. And hi def telis are right out!

Although the Reverend meant well, the phrasing of his thoughts should have been reconsidered. If we really need to hang a priest, we should go after the dirty bastards that like touching little boys.

Puzzled in a pew


Dear Puzzled,

A fine and sensitive treatment of the story my dear friend.

I marvel at a cozy scene where you, still bent over a warm internet keyboard, are visited by the resplendent visage of sweet Wisdom herself, draped in a shimmering irridescent lame' with an open back and plunging neckline. Whose soft council spills like sunlight over the war torn fields of your fatigued philosophy.

"Think of the poor, the tired, the homeless", she purrs, "it is Christmas."
. . and your dick stirs.

"But think also of the victims and their ruined plans, their loss " she whispers, and the soft folds of her loose gown slide over the smooth white skin of her naked shoulder.


You smile weakly, turning your eyes from her fresh licked lips, but find your nose a mere two inches from the deep roundness of her anxious, rolling bosoms, almost begging to be set free . . .
"Remember the story of Lot." she teases, "What manner is a village that simply watches its saddest, most unfortunate die without helping?"

Her hand runs across your hair; at this point you can't possibly stand from your chair without embarrassment . . .

"Remember also" she breathed, "this same village might well perish but for its love of the truth in the Commandments and the law."

At this point a small, bare foot steals out from the garments trailing hem.

"So small, so perfect." you think to yourself as you stare helplessly at the tiny toes which slowly brush, seductive yet somehow indifferently across your leg.

"But we can't just go around, having our priests tell the people that its plum all right to go around stealing tits from Wallmart ! ! ! . " you shout, . . . . at which point you freeze having realized the slip of the tongue.
"I mean 'shit'; that's 'shit from Wallmart' " you explain.

If your priest can only find the right rhetoric, I'll bet we can anticipate a future where some judge releases a poor, desperate homeless man who was arrested by a friendly cop who answered a 911 call from Wallmart who eventually gave the wretch a scarf they caught him trying to steal. Every one is happy, every one feels good about helping the poor; everyone feels good about obeying the law.

Now how are you going to "adjust" your metrics of morality and tear a piece off Wisdom?


Sunday, December 6, 2009

The UnForgiven


jt,
-excerpt-
CHARLESTON, W.Va. – The Gospel of Luke records that, as he was dying on the cross, Jesus showed his boundless mercy by praying for his killers this way: "Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do."
Not so fast, say contributors to the Conservative Bible Project. The project, an online effort to create a Bible suitable for contemporary conservative sensibilities, claims Jesus' quote is a disputed addition abetted by liberal biblical scholars, even if it appears in some form in almost every translation of the Bible.

Comment: In these hard times, to thrash out at the center figure of the beliefs of so many spiritual factions is an affront to those that worship his godliness and is more than in poor taste. If they need to soften the power of mercy for conservative sensibilities, let them first examine the feeding of many with two fish and six loaves of bread. Can't get too much more conservatively merciful than that.
hoop

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Hoop,
I've come to a workable compromise when faced with the similar frustration born of dealings with powerful groups and their misguided aggressions. Aren't these the same people that would have America's socialized education system withhold Darwin's theory of evolution from our children on the principle of Biblical infallibility? And all this while simultaneously denouncing Socialism? Philosophy, like personal hygiene, is an abstraction from nature of its more intrinsic subtleties directed toward the development and employment of a system devised to neutralize man's vulnerability to the natural order.

From these elements and axioms we sculpt our laws and physics, humanize our enigmas and sanitize all record of our contemporary membership in the animal community. But as Jerry Seinfeld once remarked, personal hygiene is a labor intensive compulsion. "If your body was a car, you wouldn't buy one." If clear, logical thought came without effort to an individual, you would most likely find him heavily sedated in some Asylum for the Fragmented and Despondent. We debate as a species for the simple reason that no argument is of itself an end, but rather an invitation for a multitude of contradictions. No great campaign was ever satisfied but that it edited life to fit some predisposed, amputated objective; each man satisfied to yield some portion of fact for a tidy summation of his personal, inevitable truth.

And what is an opinion but some position along a scale on which the pleasant is measured against the unpleasant by virtue of an individual's agility with numbers and ingenuity with the language. Many a fact was held to be unsound for centuries before that certain "character" arrived with the skill to express its evolved truth. Though the metrics of the condition remained fixed for those many years, it was the elasticity of the words, the rough distinction of their definitions and the syntax which provided a fresh opportunity for the new interpretation.

Take for example the Pythagorean superstitions of numeric coincidences; the five "Platonic solids" and subsequent "music of the spheres"; our profoundly diverse interpretations of the appearance of life on Earth or the polarized approaches of Keynes and Friedman to economic practices in the United States. Each "truth" exists consequent to the edit and particularly, the dismissal of related data whose mere acknowledgement would challenge the primary objective.

In the case of Pythagoras, the crisp, objective discovery of numeric coincidence transposed a degree of unwarranted authority to a framework of intangible spirituality, a cosmic force, whose legitimacy survived the absence of equivalent interrogation.
Pythagoras' legacy alone was enough to excite Johannes Kepler's imagination to conclude the existence of a relationship between planetary orbits and the geometric volumes of Plato's five ideal solids. Although he outlived the conviction of own his epiphany, he would survive to witness a greater personal achievement.
Darwin's version of evolution simply challenges the authority of Judeo/Christian scripture. A true mess here.
. . . and Keynes, noted British Economist, would take your paycheck and put it in the bank for a steady, moderate return, whereas Friedman, (think "de-regulation"), would aim for higher profits at the track.

In every case we approach our subject with some primary assumption, trusting our scales, watches and thermometers to reveal some accountable fact of its nature. These instruments then cough out their numbers onto pages where they are arranged and subsequently shuffled into some context. Though the numbers present themselves as metaphorical stones whose face value is presumed eternal and unyielding, such is not the case with the language used to relate them.

Words begin at their core like the pit inside a peach, firm and distinct. But through context and metaphor, idioms are born and layers are grown onto the seed, not unlike the juicy meat of the peach. It is through this process we learn to value and treasure our language and cultivate our long fascination with literature. And from this peach we must provide a context to our arithmetic.
How could one expect mankind to have the accuracy of our deliberations keep pace with our predilection for ambiguity; our love for association? Philosophy is as difficult on the mind as weight training is on the body; an inconvenient fact has never stopped the idiot from expressing an opinion, formed in the vaccuum if its conspicuous exclusion. Outmatched by disciplined logic, these passionate yet compromised individuals have leveled the playing field with a spurious approach to an art form called Rhetoric, designed by their adversary and used to considerable effect against them.

Rhetoric is the skill of leaning words of specific innate potential, soft sides back to back, until they no longer stand perpendicular to the flat baseline of reason, creating instead a fresh, innovative angle closer to the craftsman's object yet further from the original ideal, namely: Truth. Cases are constructed in this manner that conform to a logical framework, woven of dubious, unsubstantiated or concocted material; a Christmas tree adorned with sugar ornaments in the rain. It is small wonder therefore that the history of our development, through its art, literature and science, has continually wrestled with a reluctance to acknowledge the ironic reflection staring back at us from the shiny lenses and forceps of our kitchens, laboratories and temples. It was essential that God's decision to create man in accordance to his own likeness was addressed so early on in the Bible. In this manner it was established as an axiom, beyond further analysis.

I believe firmly that our single common denominator as a species is a specific form of loneliness, that painful emptiness felt most figuratively by the child in an orphanage. We ache to discuss our achievements, our self love and our plans for the future with some paternal, guiding soul. We desperately wish to impress, to be counseled and caressed by something not simply equal to our race. How ironic that this wonderful blue planet, teeming with life, should leave us so lonely this way. So our Gods came to interview for the position. Some came and left for better employment elsewhere, some were layed off and some were fired. Some are with us today, hired when the company was smaller and charged to reinvent themselves as the corporation grew.

In light of this brief discussion of my opinion of opinions, I would like to close by applying some principles to the subject of your letter.

1] If there did indeed exist a man named Jesus, was he the Son of God?
- if yes, then move on to his life's work.
- if no, then the issue is done.

2] Was he executed for his life's work?
- if yes, then move on to his dying words
- if no, then why was he executed? (i will not continue this here)

3] Did he ask forgiveness for his executioners?
- If yes, what are the positive and negative implications?
- If no, what are the positive and negative implications?

Assuming these individuals who are editing the current version of the book of Luke are concerned with the Bible's legitimacy as an authoritative text, I can only conclude that they are amputating such knowledge from their rhetoric to protect a higher ideal, some greater good. If this is correct, I need someone to explain the potential, viral harm which hides in Forgiveness.
Then I would like an explanation for the use of the "infallibility" clause with respect to Genesis. The Bible is infallible or it is not. You must not confuse your stones for peaches lest you lose a tooth.
jt,

A rare occasion it is when, meeting at the railway depot of thought, we're not found standing on opposite platforms. Although easy to follow, the simplicity of your flow chart seems to have eluded many "great thinkers" of these times. But the true/false method of quizzing time-honored "givens" leaves little room for the filibustering responses of those who like to think they know better than the annals of the brilliant, celebrated and/or righteous ones.

The analogy to the peach with regard to this discussion was appropriate. As such, I offer the rhetoric of the worm and it's need to feed as nothing more than an attempt to spoil the fruit for the many that enjoy it's nourishment. Our twenty first century, online bible scholars need a reminder. Our beliefs are healthy and living well within the pit of our souls. And lest they fear otherwise, our fruit is dusted daily. If I may quote a phrase, most associated with the journalist Ernie Pyle, "There are no atheists in fox holes".

Believing must be complete. Besides, The Pearly Gates would be an awful place to learn of holes in their sacred story, and peaches as well.
- hoop

Hoop,
Why must "believing" be complete?
- jt

jt,
With respect to your response, you've got quite the economy of words. Running low on hot air to keep your balloon aloft? I doubt it.

I’ve apparently used a phrase that didn’t convey my thought as I intended. Perhaps I should have written "We must be true to the beliefs we embrace". Stated facts are often questioned. This can be expected and is often necessary to reach a full understanding of what one has engaged. In taking hold of a belief, specifically one's spiritualism, we can’t simply pick and choose specific aspects of the facts, myths, and tales, ignore the rest and still profess our faith. If you wish to believe in the legend of Paul Bunyan, that's OK with me, but then you can't disavow the existence of his rather large blue ox.

Do Christians believe that Jesus turned water to wine? Was it the process of fermentation or divine intervention? Did Jesus walk on water or did he step on the backs of turtles sunning in a shallow stream bed? Whatever the circumstances of these (apparent) miracles, free of physical evidence, they will always remain miracles in the hearts of those who have chosen to believe in Christ and his teachings.

Did Christ forgive those who put him to death? The question relates to the speaking of these words as he, nailed and tied to a cross, was dying. Writing of a verbal forgiveness may have been done to exemplify the height of his mercifulness. From what I’ve learned of crucifixion he would have had difficulty breathing let alone attempting to speak. So when asked if Christ forgave his executioners I answer, in accordance with his teachings, yes. By the way, research concludes that a cross true to the shape we now associate with the son of God may be inaccurate. Do we strike this image from the records as well?

Our Conservative Computer Bible Scholar has a right to question the Book of Luke. This freedom however doesn’t permit him to re-write Luke to meets his needs. To edit the Bible could therefore only be for his personal gain and is suspiciously hypercritical. Personally, I don’t think he knows how to believe. Oh ye of little faith. Sorry, you can't change the control group so the hypothesis is correct without raising the price of the book.
-hoop (aka:Our Lady of Pulpit Software V1.2)

. . . and this from Karen in Fla.:

Merry Meet Jeff......
I was reading your blog the other day. I found the topic of Jesus going on between you and hoop... I loved your questions.

Your first question, "was he the son of God" got me wondering. My initial reaction is then who was his mother?? How are we created through man? Why can't it be Mary?
How would God, a spirit, be able to do that...?

My next question: is there one shred of evidence that Jesus existed.? The stories tell us he died for our sins. What sins ! ! ? What did you or I do when we were born that we already had sin? I don't understand a religions that claims we are bad the minute were born. And this man died for these sins? How much guilt is that to be on our heads from young children to adults?

I guess I spent most of my young life believeing in him. That was what I was taught. As I grew older I began to question it. Now, I don't really want to say too much because I don't pretend to know any of these answers. Everyone is has the right to their own beliefs. I happen to believe that John Lennon said it best : "What ever gets you through the night."
......Blessed BE
-your little pagan friend...
( karen) I don't want you to get me mixed up with any of your other pagan friends.. love you

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

From the desk of: H. Smorgasbord, NV

More letters of urgency from my dear friends:

Dear Hot Wind,

A handful of politicians, regardless of party, are making me sicker than usual. They're all standing forward and using the Fort Hood shootings as a photo-op by voicing their opinion on what's happened and how they feel about it in the hopes of letting the voters know how intelligent and caring they are. It's too bad that they can't do this through the efforts and results as elected officials. Obama needed to address this nationally, and did so, but the rest of them have crossed that fucking line once again. On a last note, having someone sing "Amazing Grace" while Obama delivered his eulogy was an especially nice touch.

- Hoodwinked in Nevada

Dear Hoodwinked,

Some people have the gift of summarizing complex situations, using brief sound bites to expose the crocodile behind the tears. I question whether you would have been compelled to write if thirteen service men, women and civilians were murdered and our elected officials remained silent. It is certainly tempting to view every twitch and syllable from Congressional representatives as insincere and self-serving, but a time comes when the difficulty of having the office and wishing to express your sympathy and indignation are not mutually exclusive. I think John McCain, for all his polarizing political gymnastics, is an fine example of the many effective members of Congress who used the press to eulogize these fallen soldiers for the purpose of helping the nation through a period of stunned grief. I'm asking you now, to question whether your skepticism is sincere or if you are simply trying to draw attention to your self.
**************************************************************************************************

Dear P. Giov,
And speaking of the Fort Hood shootings, well, I'll keep this really simple. Some guy shoots 40 some odd people, killing a minority of them. He is confronted by the police who, in order to stop the guy from his shooting rampage, shoot to kill him. The shooter is only wounded and now hospitalized. Now, a lot of tax payer money will be used to save his life so we can judge him in court and then execute him; a definite as he is in Texas. We could have accomplished the same goal for the cost of one bullet if the police would have been trained in the art of "the coux de gras". (...I thought I saw him go for his gun, Sir...)

- the Lynch-Tax Kid

Dear Kid,

Its wonderful that your freedoms were protected these past two-hundred and thirty-three years by brave and brilliant men, women and children so you could live healthy, privileged and long enough to make a mockery of their sacrifice. Though Fort Hood is indeed in Texas, with its own rich frontier history of "field justice", don't expect the people of that great state to rally around some disturbing lawless call to forego twenty-first century judicial codes to save a few taxpayer dollars. Adding insult to mockery, you further suggest that our civilian police officers take an interpretive approach to their vows and lie to the courts when they conclude a particular situation begs their judicial intervention. I for one will continue to see that my taxes are used to keep the United States Judicial System a brick and mortar situation, complete with fabulous paneling and wood benches.

Paganism; an appeal

Hi Jeff...

Paganism is a spiritual path that honors the old ways of the triple goddess and her consort the triple god who have many names and visages that vary from culture to culture. The blessings of Gaia, the earth mother, the moon mysteries, and the transcendent wonder of the human body as a reflective vessel of immanent divinity. We celebrate the passage of the season, to honor the goddess and god in their many aspects and guises and to proactively seek personal spiritual growth. It is an expression rather than suppression of the feminine aspect of divinity in conjunction with the male aspect, a hand in hand style of empowered partnership; the journey together through life, and acceptance of feminine wisdom in healing and teaching.

Most of us celebrate the eight seasonal festivals, spaced equally over the year. There are four major sabbaths:
- Samhain (oct.31-nov.6)
- Imbolc (feb. 12)
- Beltane (apr. 30-may 1)
- Lammas (aug. 1-2)

and four minor:
- Spring equinox (mar. 20-21)
- Summer solstice (june 20-22)
- Fall equinox (sept 21-22)
- Winter solstice (dec. 21-23).

Our motto:
As it harm none, do as thou wilt....

Fundamental ethical guidelines of the pagan movement:
- Founded by Gerald Gardner (1884-1964), an amateur anthropologist and British civil servant, in 1954 with the publication of his book Witchcraft Today.

- The triple goddess is split into three aspects...maid-mother-crone. These aspects correspond to the three phases of the moon, namely waxing moon, full moon and waning moon.
maid- childhood, adolescence, purity independence,courage.
mother- mother hood, protection fertility,growth and sexuality.
crone- old age wisdom. change, transformation., death, rebirth/banshing.

The Goddess, recognized for thousands of years as one whole, divided into three aspects, was a concept later adopted by the christian religion as its trinity. Which now brings me to Sgt. Patrick Stewart who died September 25, 2005, a soldier who died in combat in Afghanistan. He was a pagan. The United States Army refused to allow his wife to place the emblem of the Pentacle on his grave. His wife Roberta Stewart announced to the press that America "remember that all freedoms are worth fighting for." And so her fight for the acknowledgement of religious diversity among the soldiers who make up the United States armed forces had begun.

Over the years families have used religious symbols such as the Jewish Star of David, the Christian Cross and the Islamic Crescent and Star, on the headstones of fallen loved ones to honor their lives, service and sacrifice. The office of Veterans Affairs had been considering such a request for 9 years with no decision. This is roughly 234 years after our country first began its fight for civil liberties, religious freedom and the freedom from arrogance and oppression by government. While the stonewalling continues, families of soldiers who gave the ultimate sacrifice are still waiting for these basic, equal rights.

My son Cory, who recently returned from honorable service with the U.S. army in Afghanistan, was under the impression that if something happened to him, the same U.S. Army for which he fought would honor his spiritual beliefs without prejudice. I am glad that we never had to discover that he was mistaken. Although our country was founded on a Judeo-christian base, the framers of the Constitution understood that religious freedom was for everyone, not just christians. The only way that this freedom can prevail is for christians to stand up and fight for the minority beliefs and religions of others. There is no way to arrive at our goal of democracy and real freedom by ignoring this uncomfortable fact. ( Can you even see this happening?) So on April 23, 2007 Americans United held a press conference to announce the settlement of Roberta Stewart's case, and in so doing, the VA added the pentacle to the list of emblems. ( . . yeah....now!)

Presidential meeting: August 2007, President Bush hosted a meeting with family members of those who had died in Iraq and Afghanistan, including some members of the Stewart family. Very compelling is the fact that Bush failed to invite Patrick's wife Roberta. True to his lack of form, President Bush later called to apologize. So I think to my self, did she really change anything? She got the emblem on his grave, but she still wasn't excepted, was she?

Cory and I talked about this when he was leaving for war and we both had to come up with something just in case. I wanted him to wear the pentacle but I was afraid for him.

- Miss you and love you... peace, Blessed Be,
Karen

Hi Jeff,

I thought I would fill you in on you a few more differences between the Pagan and Christan religion. First, Christianity sees life and the world as linear, i.e.: a beginning or "creation" and a day of judgement, which is the end of thia creation. The Pagan view is circular, the endless cycle of the seasons of birth, death and rebirth.

Christmas celebrates an event that happened 2,000 years ago. Yule celebrates an annually recurring event, the rebirth of the sun. Pagans have no concept of sin or Satan, so there is no fiery hell to worry about either.

We have our own values and ethics. The bible and gospels are the guiding rules for Christian's, Pagans are responsible for their own actions and the consequences that follow. The emphasis is on what is good in life rather than what is bad or sinful. The Pagan ethic "do what thou wilt, but harm none." is a positive morality, not a list of "thou-shalt-nots." We believe in the concept of both Goddess and God, rather then the suppression of either the female or male principle.

The Pagan religion does not have fancy written rules, for the simple fact that they can be broken and bent so easily. Why does a religion have to have these 10 commandments, a list of rules that can be bent and than frowned upon for doing so. Morally you should just know right from wrong. What is the point of the 10 commandments if people like Rev. Jim Jones are going to bend the rules for some. What makes it okay for him to make these changes in the rules? Is it because he is a rev, because he has "power" he can change it at anytime for whoever he wants? What gave him the power to change something that has been around long before his time?

love to all
karen

From the Desk of . . . . Las Vegas

jt
I was reading yet another article on what will soon be a dead bill regarding Health Care Reform and I came across this excerpt. And I quote, "Catholic bishops also eager to expand society's safety net may yet endorse the final legislation."Now, with the exception of wearing a real cool hat, is there any reason why any should give a shit about what these hypocrites endorse? I can't believe there's still a faction of individuals that actually listen to these fucking guys, not to mention a continued respect for the Catholic Clergy as well.
**************************************************************************************************

Joe Lieberman is my hero. His thoughts about wasting hundreds of thousands of dollars, if not millions, to investigate the army for not spotting the shooter in the Fort Hood incident is a very good idea. There were warning signs and red flags. Didn't anyone see this coming? Lee's see, we can actually do this right here. Will religious profiling be an acceptable tool with in the parameters of our investigative research? Hope so cause without it we won't have a case and neither will he, regardless of how many dollars he'll waste or photo opts he'll be besieged with. It won't change the outcome either. With hundreds of witnesses we should be able to hang his evil ass tomorrow, right? Too insensitive? Oh....I'm sorry.......( sometimes I just don't understand what the Jews are thinking)*************************************************************************************************
I just had to include this borrowed article knowing how interested you are in science:BIGFOOT. It's a riddle wrapped in mystery, or something like that. But it is an enigma because it doesn't exist (say it isn't so) or because we haven't had the technology to properly document the evidence? Members of Sasquatch Watch are definitely in the ladder camp. And a group of intrepid Bigfoot hunters were on the move in the Allegheny Mountains of West Virginia, armed with all the gee-whiz gadgets needed to prove, for sure, without ambiguity, definitely, that Bigfoot exists. Maybe. Although some suspicious footprints were preserved with plaster of Paris in areas where there have been so-called sightings of the beast, un-fun skeptics are unsure if this is the real deal. But enthusiasts of the furry biped have already launched big buzz on the Web. Searches on "latest Bigfoot sightings" shot up 100% overnight. Amateur sleuths also sought out "real Bigfoot pictures", "Bigfoot evidence", and "Bigfoot research organization". I was actually checking into employment opportunities when I ran across this article. I just don't see myself out there with a big net but you can't say that this isn't interesting.
*************************************************************************************************
Pelosi, Reid, and Obama. I just saw a picture of the three standing on the Capital Steps or somewhere important. "The Three Stooges Go To Washington". In all seriousness, I am a very easy going person. I have a very hard time knowing and accepting the fact that I can't seem to agree with anything that our government is doing. I feel like one in a heard of cattle and my resistance is futile. The government that my tax dollars helps to support doesn't hear my voice and for that matter doesn't want to. I don't contribute massive funds, trade sexual favors, bribe or extort into the system. I'm not a threat by being part of a minority group. I'm a regular legal citizen of this country, therefore my beliefs don't benefit the few that have made a career of using me and others like me for personal gain. The display of arrogance from the leadership of this country is unacceptable. I feel dared to oppose their agenda and stared down upon for even thinking that they are unstoppable with what they believe is right for me. Once again, if I don't want the smile of a Hollywood star then I'm not thinking correctly. And Joe Lieberman? All murders are investigate. Why waste everybody's time and money by calling a news conference to state the obvious? Now he's a man that definitely has our concerns in his heart and to the center of his agenda.Fuck them all.
- Hoop

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Dr. Cosby for President?


jt,
Being one of many unemployed Americans, I am not overly concerned for what happens abroad. Yes, it's very nice that Mr. Obama. was given a prize. But considering the state of our nation I would much prefer, as an American Citizen, to have Mr. Obama concentrate his efforts through his charisma and charm, and influence as President of the United States on domestic issues. I am all warm and fuzzy knowing that he is trying to get the Palestinians a chunk of land they can call home but my home is in jeopardy of being lost due to the financial crisis this country currently faces. I have no faith in his staff to resolve any of this country's ills but possibly with Mr. Obama at their side, full time, maybe we can improve our situation. Until then, maybe he should seek employment at the UN and leave the duties of President to someone that really wants the job as opposed to running around the world playing referee. I admit Bill Cosby isn't the man for the job but I'd much prefer a platform that he suggests, considering it deals with internal issues, as a replacement of what is helping to waste this country away. Am I shallow minded? You bet...Rent is due in less than two weeks. I am concerned about the world but it starts in my home first.
- hoop
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Dr. Bill Cosby's Political Platform:

I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE FOR PRESIDENT IN THE YEAR 2012.. HERE IS MY PLATFORM:
(1). Any use of the phrase: 'Press 1 for English' is immediately banned. English is the official language; speak it or wait outside of our borders until you can.
(2). We will immediately go into a two year isolationist attitude in order to straighten out the greedy big business posture in this country. America will allow NO imports, and we'll do no exports. We will use the 'Wal-Mart 's policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.' We'll make it here and sell it here!
(3).. When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it coming in here.
(4). All retired military personnel will be required to man one of the many observation towers located on the southern border of the United States (six month tour). They will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens.
(5). Social Security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. Neither the President nor any other politician will be able to touch it.
(6). Welfare. -- Checks will be handed out on Fridays, at the end of the 40 hour school week, the successful completion of a urinalysis test for drugs, and passing grades.
(7). Professional Athletes -- Steroids? The FIRST time you check positive you're banned from sports ... for life.
(8). Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, i.e., the first time you steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more 'life sentences'. If convicted of murder, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for the victim you killed: gun, knife, strangulation, etc.
(9).. One export of ours will be allowed: wheat; because the world needs to eat. However, a bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.
(10). All foreign aid, using American taxpayer money, will immediately cease and the saved money will help to pay off the national debt and, ultimately, lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask The American People if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision as to whether, or not, it's a worthy cause.
(11). The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and every day in Congress.
(12). The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc. My apology is offered if I've stepped on anyone's toes ..... nevertheless...... GOD BLESS AMERICA.

Sincerely, Bill Cosby
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Hoop,
Your letter bothers me intensely because your situation is becoming less and less unique. I can tell most times when you're joking and when you're not. I don't believe you are in a kidding mood right now.

I want to comment on your letter and the bare-bones politics of Dr. Cosby. He raises twelve issues in a manifesto that could serve as the playbook for a winning Nationalist party takeover of America's current, inept domestic failures. Every item on his list was aimed at the same part of my mind that I employed to run my ten year old life, a time before the discovery and adoption of an increasingly complex set of ethics which enhanced the following decades. I know very well what it means to be out of work. I have never watched a business, built with my own hands, die, like you had to. I did however spend the better part of two years illustrating pubs and restaurants, losing larger sums of money as my experience "grew". I have no greater knowledge of life's cheap shots than you. I simply write about these logistics to help keep my mind from being swallowed by the helplessness each one of us feels in the face of so many troubles, so many interrelated problems and so far outside our ability to affect any meaningful change. Without some way to file it all I would be crushed.

We have two choices you and I, tame it or ignore it. Ignore it and every piece of shit consequence from bank failures to foreclosures to healthcare to credit-gouging to "peace-keeping" missions overseas to illegal lobbyists working to pollute your drinking water for some corporate executive's Cayman Island bank account to charges of indecent exposure for walking through your kitchen in the nude . . . . .

. .ignore the news and your problems don't disappear. You simply exchange them for a set of different problems. Take the fly in your kitchen. His presence is the product of one set of conditions and the catalyst for another set of conditions. Ignoring the fly allows the breeding ground to remain undisturbed and productive. Merely brushing him out of your face allows him to spread disease. Bill Cosby seems to offer a solution that was tried in a depressed German nation back in the late twenties and thirties. Unless we keep our heads focused on the mechanics of those conditions which foster the breeding of flies, stirring speeches will simply rally the nation to act without concern for the profile or motives of the author. History has exposed many of these windbags to be sculpted from the same pile of shit the flies called home.

The absurd distraction of International involvement (item [2] from Dr. Cosby's memo) would appear on the surface to be an unbearable stress on our government's slush fund. However the idea of closing our eyes and borders to the world will only replace the flies with other pests and diseases born from the same overlooked contributing habits we fail to modify. It is the responsibility of intelligent men and women to stare trouble in the eye, even when it becomes painful and speak to the mesmerized population from whatever soapbox we can find, to offer the neighborhood at least one decent option.

It is ironic to me, for example, how the crushing strain of illegal immigrants, particularly from our southern border, became a popular point of interest about the same time domestic attention to the rapidly growing gap between the rich and the poor began to appear in its contemporary, demonic proportions, sometime around the mid to late eighties, and to many a tycoon's unease, in the news.

The "mexicans", (note the lower case "m") who sought entry into the United States were met by Visa's and waiting lists. Legal entry took an average of five years. A bloke from England, France or our "good neighbor" to the north, Canada is welcomed without a Visa and is invited to stay here until the green card is issued. (Unless of course you were John Lennon and driven crazy by a very disturbed President.) With the insubstantial economic gains produced by NAFTA's trickle down promise, what desperate human being, even from Mexico, would sit on his hands and waste five or more years in the prime of his life? So now these brown skinned illegal's have become the donkeys on whose back we pile concocted charges. Their "strain" on healthcare deserves a second look. Their strain on jobs deserves a second look. Their illegal presence deserves action. But the tension, hatred and violence I witness in my own community here on Long Island is the result of some message, some "score", written and published by that same piece of shit which brought us the flies. Order? absolutely. We are a nation of laws. Illegal guests should be offered manageble guidelines to citizenship on a par with our pink skinned guests from the north. Failure to conform to the conditions of citizenship will be an irrefutable cause for deportation. Beatings, intimidations, unfairly difficult citizenship requirements and family separations? No longer tolerable, regardless of the regained sense of control it peppers back onto "We the (little) people". It all fits the pattern of good herding and stinks like shit. Meantime, unwatched, our Securities and Exchange Commission allowed those corporations deemed "too big to fail" to drag the Nation's economy into the toilet. Let's go teach those Mexican's a lesson.

The majority of illegal immigrants in this country are from the same demographic as their young legal counterparts, thirty years old and younger, healthy and uninsured. The difference lies in a "mexican's" fear to go to the hospital unless he is severely injured. A legal, uninsured American is four times likely to go to an emergency room than an illegal. It takes a broken bone, a gunshot or a pregnancy to get up the nerve for a mexican to go. There he or she will be greeted by a Visa-wielding Indian Intern, bandaged and given a cot in Immigration. Don't worry, no miserly Private Insurance company will have been harmed in the process. No small businessman will suffer the impact of a Workmans Comp claim because the worker ain't on the books anyway. And no out of work American will anxiously forego an Unemployment check to take his place doing "the job American's won't do".

But in these times where the little guy, (you and I and 90% of the legal population of the country)is being stretched, crushed and increasingly desperate, how wonderful that we have found a point of focus for our despair. If I were powerful enough, like say one of these very important Corporate Executives, and I socialized in powerful circles with members of equally powerful influence like, for arguments sake, a Media giant, a Senator or two, any one of a thousand Lobbying firms and so on . . . wouldn't it be convenient to just direct these faceless middle class and poor, who pay no mind to the details of these affairs anyway, and redirect their attention from an abusive, privileged class of tax evading corporations onto these despicable, evil and defenseless Jews! . . . i mean "mexicans"? How amusing it is to let them fight it out amongst themselves. And we thought Michael Vick was a scumbag.

Ignore the news and you have two probable choices: live with the flies or destroy your entire kitchen so they have nowhere to live. Our fingerprints are on too many broken dishes around the globe. We broke them building factories and cars so one economy could rise to lord them all. Many cultures have suffered from the global homogenization this corporate diplomacy has prevailed onto the world. "Empire Building" sounds so deliciously quaint by today's standards, smacking of British discipline and principle. I fail to see the opening of a McDonald's at the Louvre' in a similar romantic light. Closing our borders and cleaning house is less than I should expect from a man of Dr. Cosby's stature and influence. Perhaps he needs to get down from his perch and hang around a few of us "little people" for a while. The flies don't seem to fear heights anyway.
- giov

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Noble Obama / Nobel Obama


Dear Giov,

I saw this on the news and thought you'd enjoy it:

OBAMA NAMED COUNTRY MUSIC ENTERTAINER OF THE YEAR, NASHVILLE (The Borowitz Report) -

President Barack Obama stunned the country music world today by picking up its highest honor, Country Music Entertainer of the Year.Mr. Obama was chosen unanimously, according to the Country Music Association, beating out such favorite as Carrie Underwood and Toby Keith.In Nashville, country music insiders were shocked by Mr. Obama's selection, given that he has only been in office for eight months and during that time has yet to record a single country song.But Mr. Obama was gracious in receiving the honor, saying that he was "honored and humbled" by the award, before excusing himself to accept this year's Heisman Trophy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
so i replied:

Hoop,
It took me a few minutes before I realized why this made no sense. The disclaimer appears to have been erased. Showing this joke to my autistic, tone-deaf daughter did however get a laugh.

I am too well informed to understand why some Americans think Obama might deserve a music award. I suppose eight years of Bush's "No Child Left Behind" push to improve the country's literacy rate, evitably ruined the Nation's chance to raise the percentage of educated adults. Everyone with a high school diploma should know the first black President of the United States has no rhythm! What the fuck did Bush do to this Country?!

Its a precious stroke of luck the Nobel Committee did not hold Obama responsible for the International mess Bush made of things. Choosing instead to focus credit on Mr. Obama's outline for returning our Nation to the diplomatic table, the "Global Community" after eight years of arrogant gorging at the Unilateral, Industrial trough; for accepting America's complicity in offenses to the Geneva convention; for reclaiming a role of leadership in discussions of Environmental concerns; for turning the light of Health Care back onto the American people; for allowing the Justice department free reign to explore criminal violations of the Constitution by members of the previous admiinistration and for trying to get the Olympic Committee to think Chicago.

The hope is there. The prize is a clever way for the Norwiegans to simply raise the octane level. Its their prize, let them do with it what they will. If the prize is so unfair, so meaningless, why all the fuss and prestige? My guess is that all those Republicans who scorn it keep an empty space on their mantle. Just big enough for a gold banjo. - jt-

and so it went on . . .

jt,
Did you take offense to this play on worldly events and for just the moment believe I had intended to serve a politically motivated volley of discontent with the prize bestowed upon our beloved Obama? Shame on you. It appears you do not know me as well as I thought.
- a very disappointed hoop

Mr. Hoople,
Would you take me for a fool? I remind you that My High Schooling was Ford-Carter vintage and my University studies Carter-Reagan. The younger Bush was still piss-drunk and unconscious on the Astro's outfield when I was filling up at the academic pump. No my Brother, his stain is not on me. I can tell a lampoon when I smell one . . . and that country music story of yours stinks to high-heaven of some lampoon way past the expiration date. Shame on you. It appears I'm not a dumb as you thought. God bless America.
- a highly disappointed jt

jt,
It appears that I've opened a fissure in the once stable ground where we stood together and appreciated a joke or two, politically motivated or not. Considering the degree of erection your hackle has experienced and due the the lack of concern I have exhibited for your political beliefs , I will do my very best to avoid the deliverance of any such political humor through the waves of cyber space, or other modes of communication, to any destination that may reach your liberal sensitivities.I therefore would like to apologize to you, and your family, for any inconvenience or embarrassment suffered due to my poor choice in said humor.
- Humbly, Hoop ----

Mr. Hoop,
Your insincere mea culpa only serves to further salt the fields of our long and seasoned friendship. To have me think your "news flash" from the Grand Ol' Opry was a legitimate attempt to praise the President of this great Nation of ours would have taken more than just a wiff of paltry sentiment from a shared past gone more than a little strange, but perhaps two or more of those delightful, red b-b sized hits of "25" you used to corrupt my youth and subsequent trajectory toward a sound financial portfolio. My ability to appreciate a joke was never tested during this most recent and unfortunate exchange, as from my perspective, nothing of the kind ever entered into it. I recall only the smile of my fresh risen face as I savored a sip from a steaming cup of morning coffee in front of the monitor upon which the world wide web, Al Gore's baby, greeted me with news of your missive. With the eagerness of a young cubscout brandishing his newest survival instrument, I rattled the keyboard in fevered anticipation, responding to every command, every request, each password with emphatic keystrokes, strutting like a drag biker in the Rainbow Day Parade. What could Kevin have to say ? . . . .

Your apology is unnecessary. I simply pity you and the new crowd you hang with. I choose to pass on the kool-aid this time and marvel instead at the shaft of light piercing through the smoke covered field of carnage where Bush's experiment with diplomacy went awry. Please send me another "joke". I enjoy a good laugh now and then.
-your pal, jt

Friday, October 16, 2009

Cubscouts, Sporks and al-Qolumbine


jt -
BEAR, Del. – A Delaware first-grader who was facing 45 days in an alternative school as punishment for taking his favorite camping utensil to school can return to class after the school board made a hasty change granting him a reprieve.
The seven-member Christina School Board voted unanimously Tuesday to reduce the punishment for kindergartners and first-graders who take weapons to school or commit violent offenses to a suspension ranging from three to five days. - hoop

hoop,
What's stranger, I'm asking myself. The way the media grabbed this story and promoted it to the status of "real news", or your own fascination with it? I realize that you're a man on the edge lately. As a man who, by my estimation, should not be allowed to carry a spoon/fork/knife cooking utensil into a public building, I'm sure you feel a certain fraternity with this young, political prisoner, simply expressing his religious (cub scout) beliefs. But the point is made all the more painful by virtue that in the end, everyone had a good laugh and just didn't seem to care. You must be ready to crack. I promise to post your farewell "jihad" letter on my blog, misspellings and all. Who's always there for you bro? - jt

jt,
Now that I have a moment I'd like to address your comments concerning this news article. The kid is 6 years old. I sure he doesn't even understand what has transpired here although the School Board believed 45 days at a juvenile reform school would be adequate punishment for the crime he had committed. After reconvening, it seems that a 3 to 5 day suspension for a 6 year old child bringing a combination fork, spoon, knife, can opener, with a hide away toothpick and branded with the Cub Scout Insignia to 1st grade class is definitely more fitting for the offense. So, Justice has been served. I would love to see this situation from their point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass. This kid still doesn't understand the implications of his act and won't for several years. "Mom and Dad" should have gotten a phone call from Mrs. Crabtree and asked to come pick up the utensil then explain to young Johnny the error in choice. Do you remember that bulky, imitation grooved wood grain piece of shit? I guarantee you that the kid doesn't possess the strength or coordination skills to do anything more with the dam thing than pull open the fork or spoon.It's not about the kid and his cub scout utensil. The mentality of the administrative staff that put this situation into play is questionable. I fully understand what the implications could have been for not following the rules for all involved. Regardless, someone should have seen the situation for what it was truly worth then stepped outside the box of this particular rule and handled it accordingly. And I fully understand why you or anyone else would say I'm wrong. The next time a kid picks up the scissors in class should he get tackled and dragged off to the office for having a weapon in his hands? How about the damage one can do another with a pen or pencil? The only crime I can see is this poor kid is missing a week of school and will have to deal with the fallout of other kids looking at him like he's Jack the Ripper. Yes, I am cracking up and yes, this is news worthy. The state of our nation sucks. The kid didn't bring a weapon to school, he brought a cub scout utensil to school. This kid still writes letters to Santa Claus and waits impatiently for the fucking Easter Bunny. He has no idea about gang violence. He doesn't know what happened at Columbine. He doesn't know who Al Qaeda is. I hope he can enjoy a few more years of innocence before he needs to be taught about all of this evil shit. I hope the staff at his school has learned their lesson, also. - hoop

no. you're not wrong . . . about mourning the loss of common sense.

Common sense hasn't been lost. We all know what the right thing to do is. Common sense has been replaced by a set of rules so refined that the ability for us to make a common sense decision has been outlawed. Your common sense decision lies within the bounds of a flow chart.

Hoop,
And this is new? Or has it suddenly lost all proportion? Has it become the latest crisis of our time? Is it a symbol of our failure, yours and mine, and our entire generation from the sixties and seventies? Our turn to take the wheel and raise this next generation of kids into adults, only to forget our way; replacing our hearts and sensibilities with tidy, anal-retentive rules? Or is it something else? Is this story a legitimate test of the principle or an amusing illustration of an isolated incident? . . I seem to recall spending a fair amount of time with you back at Hauppauge exposing similar disciplinary excesses; dancing on the edge, where reason and common sense met the outer boundaries of nonsensical new rules for a showdown . . . Rules that had more to do with control than valid principle or safety. Rules that seemed to disrespect us as people for the simple crime of being under the age of eighteen. These assholes wanted our minds and souls and used the rulebook as a shield against our clearest, most eloquent defenses . . . . (which spitefully we offered anyway, in ample doses.) I don't think this case is worth ignoring. I love how much it pisses you off. I just look back at a time where young kids were prevented from going to school because they were black. Sometimes they were stopped because they were women. A kid in the first grade was taken aside recently to explain where he got the gun he smuggled into class. Another kid was just buried by his family after his young friend showed him how his father taught him to shoot. I don't know why this school made the rule, but I have an idea that a little comon sense, as you suggest, would have gone a long way to prevent this case from becoming a National embarrassment. How about the one where a kid in Kindergarten was handcuffed by a cop who was called in by the school to moderate a disciplinary situation? This shit will apparently go away only when some generation can prove that its ranks are free of assholes. Its a story as old as the birch switch. We've simply traded whips for handcuffs.- jt

jt
A kid in grade nine, here in Vegas at a High School across town, who when reading about was an obvious choice for Lonny's double. On a sunny afternoon in the fall of last while walking home for school with a crowd of kids, he caught a bullet in a drive by shooting and to this day it haunts me. The young shooter took a shot a someone else whom he thought had said something to or about his girlfriend. This tragedy has just hit the court house here and again I live with the thoughts of an asshole that robbed this world of a good life. Again, my worries have been heightened when my kid leaves the house. There is no doubt that bad shit happens everywhere but there is something to be said for the taking of hand if a loaf of bread has been stolen. It would behoove us all to see if its rye or pumpernickel before the axe is in motion. -hoop

Monday, October 12, 2009

A Pirate Tale


A recent letter from Kevin (Hoop):

jt
A handful of brilliant Somali Pirates were in the process of attempting to hijack a commercial ship when, much to their surprise, they realized they were attacking a French Naval Vessel. Instead of training a cannon on the little piece of shit skiff that these ocean going geniuses were mounting their campaign from, the French Sailors hit them with a spot light and bull-horned out the message that they were all under arrest.

Obviously, in such a situation, the French Navy had several options to choose from. With their honor, pride and nobility in place, and a great opportunity to express a willingness to conduct worldly business with a sense of humanitarianism, The French Captain made the decision to take Skipper Skinny and his skiff full of Somali Gilligans into custody.The photo op was great. Several poor Somalis, and some wearing nothing more that pants, being held against their will (photos #1 & #2)* for allegedly attempting to overpower a huge naval vessel with their little out board motor boat. (photos #3 & #4)*.

Shit like this goes over well at the UN. Considering that the ACLU has very little weight with respect to the International Community, pieces of splintered wood and the floating remains of those skinny ass sons of bitches would have made for good pictures as well. Actually, the pirates shouldn't get any press. We should quietly blast them all out of the water.

"But they have hostages" you might say. If they kill their hostages they'll have nothing to negotiate with(and you know how they love to say negotiate) so maybe they'll do one or two. If we blow up pirates, we'll eventually run out of pirates. Sounds like a win/win to me. Our Government can't seriously be concerned about the death of hostages. That would fall into the category of collateral damage.

Considering the Afghan Theater, every time we send up a Predator, fitted with ordnance, the probability for collateral damaged exists yet we continue to fly. In other words, if (you) don't have an issue with the continuing overseas contingency, blowing up pirates should be a walk in the park never mind a turkey shoot.
- hoop
, (* photos are not yet posted)

Hoop,
Your letter is remarkably energetic; displaying that singular talent of yours for observing a perimeter of sympathetic detail for each opposing side of a situation, leaving no doubt in the surprise finale whose head must coldly roll into the basket. I cannot argue with the greater majority of your frustration. Every attempt by humanitarian groups to squeeze the "Somalian Pirate Engagement" into a biblical perspective appears on the surface to ignore the true lesson of David the Jew's defeat of Goliath the over-sized Philistine. The French, it would appear are evil by virtue of their overwhelming advantage. The proper thing for any reasonable Naval vessel to do under the circumstances would have been to simply pass the hat and lower a basket of joy to the tiny, angry little pirates below. This would serve as a lesson for all time to the world that France is a humanitarian superstar and further, that the aggressive techniques of Somalian fisherman-turned-thugs are not only condoned but rewarded.

The French ship decided to prevent these men from simply moving on to softer booty by arresting them. You are also implying the attached photographs have been used by humanitarian organizations to exploit the suffering of the disadvantaged under the whip of the evil West. "Several poor Somalis and some wearing little more than pants, being held against their will. . . " is how you painted it. Very moving.

To prevent the relentless travesty and exploitation of "sound justice" by the evil U.N., you suggest reducing the entire incident to an event measured by the time it takes for the thick black cloud of cannon fire to dissolve into the quiet sky above a faggot of wood splinters spread thin across the rolling sea. How antiseptic. How romantic. And no photos. Very clean.

I am reminded of the ticket I got one morning as I drove to a job site on Center Island, an exclusive community of exceeding wealth in a region of exceedingly wealthy communities just outside New York City. This place makes Greenwich, CT look like Wyandanch, Long Island. I worked here for a while as a scaffolder on a twenty-five thousand square foot, four story, Portuguese limestone mansion being built by some guy as a gift for his useless, unemployed coke-head son. Being of such privileged location and grand scale, this house can be seen from Connecticut, fifteen miles across the Sound. I drove a twenty year old Volvo. It looked every day of twenty years old.

There was only one road onto Center Island where a tiny, private Police station stood sentry. Every morning I would pass the windows of this small house wondering who was watching me from behind the half-closed blinds. I guess it never occurred to me that my presence in this community would irritate so many otherwise invisible neighbors. I was eventually pulled over and questioned for over a half hour. Where do I work? Why do I have so many coffee cups on the front seat of my car? How long am I staying? Don't I own a razor? and the one that hit the spot: "so you drive this piece of shit to our beautiful community without a valid Inspection sticker?"

The cost of this ticket only delayed my ability to have my car inspected. My personal investment portfolio at this juncture was vulnerable, you might even suggest it was weak, you see. I needed the work. So I did what any desperate, imaginative guy, a little down on his luck, with a dollar and a dream would do in my situation. I forged an Inspection sticker, kept the job and eventually got the real sticker.

The moral? Desperate times reach into a man's soul and squeeze the world into an alternate, semi-workable configuration. Some would call it survival and be done with it. Others would judge it against some code of ethics and denounce it. Better I suppose for my family to have a husband and father maintain his honor, quit his job and file for State aid. I was wrong, yes. Am I sorry for it? No. . . . .

After the collapse of the Siad Barre government in 1991, numerous Somali Warlords subsequently filled the power vacuum, fighting one another for control of the country ever since. I suppose this isn't really news. People over "there" can't get anything right. If they're not killing and raping their neighbors, they simply kill and rape each other. News from Africa never seems to change. Kenya, Uganda, Somalia, Ethiopia. . . its all pretty much the same story. Who can keep track anymore? Who cares?

When a nation of 9 million people find themselves starving, suddenly trying to make it inside a collapsed, decentralized economy, the resulting shortage of food and other resources should come as little surprise. The fisherman along the ample coastline were now the engines of small, community sized economys. The fish they brought home supplied food, the trade supplied jobs and the jobs represented some semblence of what we here in the West would call an economy. So the Warlords fought over the principles while Joe the Plumber fished. Sounds like heaven, right?

Not far enough away, however, some large unscrupulous institutions in Europe, like certain hospitals and factories, making everything from electronics to automobiles, huge companies with garbage to hide began smelling blood in the waters off Africa's horn. At around the same time, International Fishing corporations, having overworked their own waters, sailed to the same region uninvited, to do a bit of "market research" of their own. The nation of Somalia, with its two thousand mile coastline was no longer protected by a national Navy or Coast guard. Who would notice or care? Like stealing candy from a baby.

Well, in reference to the garbage dumping, its called "Toxic Colonialism" (coined by Gerd Leipold, Executive Director of Greenpeace) and is banned by a treaty signed in 1995 by 172 countries. Inspired by the "Khian Sea" incident where Haiti found itself the target of dumping by a corporation from Philadelphia; and the 8000 barrels of hazardous waste from Italy which made a small farmer from Koko, Nigeria a landlord to the tune of $100 a month rent. Known as the Basel Convention, these rules outline the processes wherein predatory industrial nations prey on fragile developing nations, desperate for cash, and agree to "ban" them. For the record, there are no rules of enforcement. Sounds like Prostitution to me. In the case of Somalia they didn't even leave a dime on the nightstand. Sounds more like rape to me.

After the collapse of the Siad Barre government, a grass roots network of loosely affiliated municipal courts organized posses to clean the streets as best they could. Their efforts helped reduce robberies and drug traffic among other crimes. With the support of the general public, based largely on results, the seperate courts formed a coalition called the Islamic Courts Union in 1999. Militias were organized to patrol the roads which were then infested by desperate thieves who robbed travelers for "toll" money. Eretria was an important supplier of weapons to the ICU. Unfortunate for the ICU was its Muslim association with Al Shabab, an organization on the United States Terrorist list. In 2006, a push by the ICU to take back control of a whole Somalia was defeated when forces from Ethiopia, backed by the Bush Administration in the name of the United States, invaded with superior force. Heh, heh. Take that you Islamical terrorist Evil Doers! . . heh

Now lets take a look at the progression of the situation on the coast. You're a poor guy from a broken country. The waters you learned to fish, that your father fished, the fish that fed your family, these waters have become both stripped of fish by fleets from uninvited foreign seafood corporations and toxic from illegal, foreign dumping. The women in the village are no longer interested in a broken fisherman. There is however, a group of ragged men with young ladies showing particular attention. Want to make it in this town? Go say hello.

The money from the pirating follows a traditional pattern. The first assaults on foreign vessels were by angry fisherman defending their turf. The money was considered a fine, a toll, payment; maybe even scare these guys off. Yeah, right. The money was nice. The attacks spread to include nonfishing vessels and waters a bit futher off the coast. Now we're talking real pirates! The business became very lucrative. We're now talking the kind of money needed to buy real firepower. One Supertanker could net $30 million in ransome. We're talking rockets! So the illegal gun trade took off. With the guns came power. This is not an easy thing to let go of. Power needs money. This is the root of the modern Somalian Pirate trade.

Its just a shame the U.S. had to crush the ICU back in '06. The escalation of illegal gun trading would not have been tolerated by an organized militia or National police force for that matter. Without an easy gun market, the pirating might been less feverish and better managed from the mainland, where contemporary efforts by an embarrassed and "concerned" International community have finally focused.

It has been suggested that Obama makes the Industrialized West look weak by using restraint in the issue of Piracy off the African Horn. More force, Mr. Newt Gingrich implores, will teach these savages a lesson about messing with the "civilized" world. Your letter to me suggests that more damage is done to our noble cause, to wipe piracy from the books of modern nautical lore, by humanitarian groups with digital cameras than we can continue to bear. "Collateral Damage" is the anticeptic coin we in the West use to describe brown skinned civilians holding their unsubscripted dead. Thank GOD we're spared the obnoxious wailing! Let's just save these whining bastards some film. Wait . . . those new cameras don't use film, do they? . . .My bad! lol

Piracy is wrong and pirates should be arrested. I do not argue this point. Illegal fishing in foreign seas is equally wrong. Toxic dumping is worse. Pirates take booty. Illegal fishing by large, well equipped commercial ships ruins entire villages. Toxic dumping is obscene on a global scale. I merely suggest an effort of equivilant substance and might be employed to address the grievances of the Somali people that has been focused on their most desperate sons.
- Giov

and from David Debrocke:
Piracy is going as strong as it was in the Golden Age. The only difference now is that the game has changed quite a bit. Instead of Galleons and sloops, pirates are equipping themselves with fast speed boats and instead of swords and cannons they are using assault weapons.With the latest attack on the French naval vessel, that just goes to show the world that they are dealing with not the sharpest tools in the shed, compared to such pirates as Blackbeard or Captain Kidd. This is a serious problem throughout the world it has been estimated that pirates are responsible for millions of dollars lost in goods through shipping for a course of one year. So what could be the answer to being rid of these scourages of the oceans? Hoop has a point about just blowing them out of the water, but who's shoulders does that responsibility fall upon? For most of these countries they do not even have a police force, much less than a government, or even a Navy. There has been stated accounts of pirates attacking a vessel,then the next day officials show up and ask the Captain and crew could you Identify these pirates that attacked you? They would say yes and then point at the police officers and say that it was them! How insane is that! So many times it is the actual people that are suppose to defend there countries waterways that are doing the actual act of piracy. Many of these shipping companies have thought about providing an armed escorts through these waters where piracy is abundant, but that cost is enormous and that would only be kicked back to us the consumers. On top of that Maritime law is not clear on who has the legal right to defend these ships. Most vessels are usually registered in other countries that differ from there home ports.So where does the responsibility lie ??? Personally I think this is a huge problem and should be addressed before it really gets out of hand.I think the only way to really do that is by rewriting Maritime law and bring it into the future. So Jeff and Hoop I hope you enjoy a little different insight. Oh by the way I am David, Karen's husband.Hope everything is well on your guys end! Have a wonderful day! Sorry still trying to figure out this whole computer thing! - David

David,
It is late. I have read your letter three times. Thank you for opening the subject to include questions outside the original debate. Solutions similar to Kevin's suggestion of terminal force need to survive a well reasoned challenge before they are condoned. I simply began my exercise by asking whether a man is born into crime or driven to crime. Victor Hugo eloquently addressed this many years ago in the classic, Les Miserables. I believe the corrupting influence of profit without sacrifice is stronger than any society's ability to act within the sctrictest confines of their principles. We all seem to know what is right, yet live self-righteously compromised by collateral conditions. These extraneous details, referred to as "extenuating circumstances" are acknowledged factors of our own American judicial system, employed to reconfigure a series of events into a more favorable context, creating the dynamics or tensions so frequently exploited in our entertainment productions, most prevelantly by our television dramas.

Rising from this snake pit of America's lowest cultural denominator back to the practical, brick and mortar reality of the law, our personal protection under these same principles exposes the shameful disconnect within a society whose better interests lie in acknowledging the damage done when denying these same libertys to our neighbors, yet opts to withhold them regardless. The illegal dumping of toxic waste will not be addressed by declaring open season on the pirates. The same applies to the collateral effects of zero-tolerance piracy laws on the enforcement of illegal fishing practices. It is simply difficult for the comfortable citizen of the industrialized West to accept an equation for harmony any more complex than hitting the gopher with a nine iron.

As I said, it is late. This is not the way I would like to reply to you. I'm tired and you deserve some real, engaging feedback. Please let me know if you would mind having your letter posted on the blog. Few read it outside a few friends and family, but it keeps a few of us both inspired and de-stressed. Thanks again, -jt

Merry Meet Jeff,

After talking with our friend Hoop on the phone. He thought I should give you my take on Piracy. I don't think all pirates are bad. Take Jack Sparrow, he was a priate in the caribbean. His ship being the Black Pearl was stolen from him by Barbarosa. Jack just wanted his ship back. He did not rape anyone or steal from anyone.. He like his rum and seem to be very friendly.. ( and very cute too.) Now even though Barbarsoa did steal the Black Pearl from Jack. He did turn his life around and help Jack get it back. On that note... you see not all pirates are bad. and they do have the ability to change and be better pirates. That is my take on Piracy.
karen &n bsp;

© Jeff Thomas 2009

Saturday, October 10, 2009

The Tapeworm


I'm sick of the number of creeps who drag Religion down the basement stairs and tie it to a chair. Here's another fine example. This file was e-mailed to me in adobe format. I had to transcribe the text from the original as I was unable to copy it or provide a link. I hope to supply the photos soon.
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The Chain Letter from Mr. Terry Moon:

"You have to see these pictures. I would love to see it in person. This is about 70 miles outside Amerillo in a town called Groom, TX.

(This must have been an awesome labor of love.)
Read message at the end of pictures!
These are the pictures of the crucifixion of Christ
Sculptured from metal by a man near Amerillo, TX . . .
The crosses are made of metal also. The man did
this out of the kindness of his heart.
Someone donated the land
On which to erect them.
Who is Jesus?
HE IS JESUS
WHO IS HE?
In Chemistry, he turned water into wine;
In Biology, he was born without the normal conception;
In Physics he disproved the law of gravity when he ascended into Heaven;
In Economics, he disproved the law of diminishing return by feeding 5000 men with two fishes & 5 loaves of bread; In medicine, he cured the sick and the blind without administering a single dose of drugs;
In History, he is the beginning and the end;
In Government, he said that he shall be called wonderful counselor, prince of peace In religionhe said no one comes to the father except through him;
So who is he? He is Jesus!
Join me and let's celebrate him; He is worthy.
The eyes beholding this message shall not behold evil,
The hand that will send this message to everybody shall not labor in vain,
AND THE MOUTH SAYING AMEN TO THIS PRAYER SHALL SMILE FOREVER.
Remain in God and seek His face always. Amen. . .
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And The Kicker ! :

If you believe in God and in Jesus Christ His son, Send this to all on your Buddy List
If not just ignore it. IF YOU IGNORE IT, JUST REMEMBER THAT JESUS SAID
IF YOU DENY ME BEFORE MAN, I WILL DENY YOU BEFORE MY FATHER IN HEAVEN."
YOU MUST SEND THIS TO 8 PEOPLE
IN 8 MINUTES YOU WILL RECEIVE SOMETHING YOU HAVE LONG AWAITED.

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and the response:

To all,

Thanks for the photos. A truly inspiring act of faith by the artist. The labor intensive process of bronze casting alone puts this work in a class far beyond mere talent. I especially enjoy his fearless homage to Sig. Buonarroti's " Pieta' ". Though uneven in their individual attitude and degree of aesthetic excellence, the scale and literal thoroughness make for a commanding unity. I believe Jesus himself would be moved. However . . .

Wasn't it enough to just show the photographs? It puzzles me why sharing an unambiguous expression of one man's devotion to Christ through sculpture is not a satisfactory end in itself but needs to develop into some passive-aggressive deconstruction of the viewer's personal relationship with Jesus. It is a respectful tradition among the audience at symphonic performances to withhold personal expressions of disappointment or satisfaction until annotated breaks or the end of the performance. At issue here is the potential for one individual to infect the artist's intentions toward the group as a whole.

Mr. Moon's captions were anti-climatic; a self indulgent effort to climb onto the pulpit and steal the show. The fragility of the spiritual influence on the creative process is too subtle for him. So we are rewarded at the slide show's end with Terry Moon's epiphany:

Separate the Obedient from the Damned.

These images of events in the life of Christ were little more than a springboard for his own self love and a call to emphasize the line between "Us" and "Them". I'm sure Jesus would be turning in his grave (if things didn't go a bit differently.) He never even named to the sculptor. No, this was all about Terry Moon.

In the Gnostic text of Thomas, Jesus tells us to seek our heaven here on Earth. Our own Thomas Jefferson reworked this theme, editing his King James with a fine blade, creating what is now known as the Jeffersonian Bible. Simply remove the "controlling, supernatural themes"; leave the Love. Anyone with love in his heart can now find heaven, rich or impoverished, independent of the Church Almighty. The implications of this perspective were apparently too threatening to those assembled at Chalcedon. I'm only sorry the Protestants, for all their fine efforts, chose to import this stain into their playbook.

Regardless of my deep love and regard for the example set by Jesus Christ, every aggressive attempt to break my solemn, personal confidence with the Lord will be exposed for the mean spirited hog wash it is. No enthusiastic loud-mouthed zealot can threaten my disdain for juvenile, superstitious "chain-letter" voodoo nonsense with eternal damnation. No, Mr. Terry Moon, I will not forward your e-mail to everyone I know. Sorry to disappoint you, but I do not risk eternal damnation either. If you want attention, do something of substance on your own merits. You are a parasite and little more.

God and I are fine, thank you.

Send this to eight of your closest friends or your car will not start when you next need it most.

© Jeff Thomas 2009

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Camp Iguana Redux


I have occasion to receive messages from friends expressing their views on issues that concern all of us. This is a copy of the most recent letter from my good friend Kevin, (Hoople). Though I appreciate some of his insane rantings, I do not agree with him on all points. My explaination follows. I encourage every one of you to have your say. If the "comments" feature of this site still don't work, send me an e-mail at giov513@live.com
I will be sure to post it right here, without edit, for all to read. enjoy . . .

This letter from Hoople:

I haven't complained to you about the trivial stuff that fascinates the American Public in quite some time. I've been stuck on the Gitmo thing. I've written to you twice more about my thoughts surrounding the incidents and realized I was contradicting myself as each piece grew in length. I've researched this topic intensely and have come to the conclusion that we most definitely have broken international law. The articles of The Geneva Convention are very simple to understand. I think my greatest issue is with how certain members of the democratic party seem to be grandstanding an effort to bring those responsible for committing these crimes to justice. I don't know if it's a domestic political agenda they feel obligated to meet or the need to apologize to the world for our wrong doings in an effort to help create a kum-by-ya type atmosphere. We don't need to push it but justice should be allowed to run its course, and I think it would behoove us to keep this kind of stuff off page one. And do you really think the people charged with interrogating our Prisoners of War were going to say "No....I'm not allowed to do that".

They would have been fired for not doing their job as requested by The Commander in Chief. I would say what a confusing dilemma. I can't help but to think about Harry Truman when this subject is discussed. He signed an executive order giving our military permission to drop two nuclear bombs. Approximately 200,000 Japanese civilians were either vaporized or died a slow and painful death from the effects of radiation poisoning. Granted, The Geneva Convention was a work in progress at that time but should Harry have been brought to justice for conspiracy to murder for all of those innocent lives taken? He had our Nations Security on his mind just as our past administration did. They all did what they thought was necessary to insure our safety. Just a thought. A phrase was coined when we were battling with foes abroad in the 40's. "Loose Lips Sink Ships". Some things are truly a matter of National Security. For that young cub reporter looking for that big break, you know, the Big Story....look elsewhere. It could very well be his dwelling that the next plane crashes into.
- hoop
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and a response:

September 11, 2009

"He who would sacrifice freedom for security deserves neither" - Ben Franklin
"Better that a hundred guilty men are free than one innocent man is imprisoned." - British justice William Blackstone

Hoop,

It is simply unfortunate for you that I received your message less than a week after watching Anne Coulter speak her mind about the traitors and sissy-boys currently investigating the abuses at Gitmo during the previous eight years; proof that rhetorical agility is not a measure of intelligence but rather a "stupid human trick", like flame swallowing, throwing a football or moving Rush Limbaugh's lips.

I grant you neither men quoted above lived through the nightmare of Sept. 11. They, in their time, saw enough however, including the slaughter of thousands in a fight to redefine a new land and realize a radical, new philosophical promise with no concrete precedent. Integrity against Tyranny; as old a fable as David and Goliath. It was just simple men, farmers, merchants and craftsmen, dying in some field, in the water, in the snow, for a principle; for some neighbor's compelling, abstract idea of a new social order. I think these guy's saw their fair share.

The Unites States as victim on that horrible day is as heart wrenching a tale as it is void of context. The entire truth needs to be repeated for as long as it takes for sympathies such as the one expressed in your message to be validated. Silence in the face of government sanctioned aggression, in defiance to overwhelming outrage abroad, simply reaffirms an individual's complicity. I choose instead to include the unpleasant historical events into this analysis and do my part to ensure that there should never be another administration like the one we endured for the past eight years.
The United States is viewed by many cultures around the world as an obese, voracious corporation armed to the teeth. Its scale and appetite has no historical precedent. Without the confidence in our integrity, our diplomacy, nothing remains to trade but our muscle. Taming the world's resources requires guns and cunning, a fact well documented by all sides of the political aisle. We all read the same history books.

Here is a short list of some examples of our aggressive interference and intrusion into the affairs of foreign, sovereign nations for self serving objectives:

- The U.S funded government coup which brought the Shah to power in Iran;
- the backing/funding of a "regrettable" resistance movement in Cuba led by one Fidel Castro to unseat the government of Fulgencio Batista; . . . (should've done our homework here)
- the illegal funding of a paramilitary/terrorist group seeking to overthrow the legitimate government in Columbia we named "Freedom Fighters"; (remember the Iran-Contra scandal?)
- the abandonment and betrayal of Ho Chi Min, (pen pal of F.D.R.) and his Viet Cong forces (once enamored of the principles of U.S. democracy), seeking independence from growing Communist forces, just to kiss some Imperialistic French ass in our Cold War campaign. The subsequent horror of the Vietnam "conflict" resulted in sixteen years of squandered opportunity for mutual political and economic cooperation, (Twenty-four years later, the victorious Communist nation of Vietnam made the computer mouse I'm using to write this essay);
- the support of the corrupt Nigerian military dictatorship of General Sani Abacha, protecting the activities of foreign oil companies, (Shell and Chevron, Hess, Lonestar, Mobil and more), who destroy the fishing and agricultural livelihood and traditions of its people with the toxic footprint of Western-styled "progress". Protests by the people here are met by armed soldiers who maintain order through murder, rape and intimidation. Prisoners like the peaceful activist Ken Saro-Wiwa and eight others from the Ogani region receive scripted trials which ended predictably in execution by hanging
- the use of American military resources to provide security for the financially connected Wahhabite monarchy in Saudi Arabia. On July 31, 1987, the police force of this regime beat over four hundred visiting worshippers to death (reports vary in range to over fifteen hundred dead) in a confrontation between the ideologies of the native Sunni and visiting Iranian Shiite pilgrims, at Mecca, the Holiest site in the Moslem world. It was this single event that created the counter-revolutionary philosophy of Osama Bin Laden and subsequently, the terrorist organization we now fight known as Al Qaeda.
- the unconditional support of the United State's single minded diplomatic and military policies for Israel's genocidal behavior toward the Palestinians.
- the illegal invasion of a sovereign Iraq under false and calibrated pretenses and all associated attempts to cover-up that project;

. . . . to name a just few high profile examples.

The United States since the latter half of the nineteenth century inherited an economic appetite of such voracity, such efficiency that no example from history could serve to caution or exemplify moderation. Ours were the spoils and the Planet our playground. It is my firm conclusion that four classes of citizens remain in the United States.
- The first group understand the system well enough to promote and manipulate it.
- The second class support the government's effort and maintain, in the name of patriotism, what cherry picked pieces they benefit from, and understand of , it.
- The third group understand the complexity and compromises involved in our economy's insatiable demand for resources; deride the governing principles as hypocritical and immoral; yet coexist among the first two groups of necessity. This class however, offers little constructive rhetoric toward a vision of any consensus let alone any practical, timely alternative. Visionaries we are, salesmen we are not.
- The fourth class are the American Ex-patriots; living in the murky shadow of complicity on some foreign soil.

I have glossed over the details of the select historical subtexts above, ignoring the drama and patriotic idealism of the U.S. troops who gave their lives in these struggles, in order to expose in the fewest words my conviction that the evil forces driving our economic system use patriotic citizens from the lower economic strata like disposable condoms. They fuck the world with latex boys in uniform as protection. They convince the mothers and fathers of America to send their kids into battle because America needs Middle East oil to fill our cars, Nike sneakers made by children in Indonesia to give style to our hopeless and keep our grocery shelves stocked and surrealistically photogenic.

We, the American citizens who make the cars and guns, who mine the steel and build our cities, roads and bridges; who consume like locusts all of the world's resources, we are persuaded that one cannot live without these extra-necessary trappings. We however are never consulted when our elected leaders act to repay clandestine debts to self serving and powerful lobbyists and business associates. We are bred by the true power brokers of this country like mules, sheep and Clydesdale's in accordance to our modest choices and potential; vetted and indoctrinated by our media and our communities. Yet when the world looks down in shame, anger or disgust at the trespasses of our power elite, it is "we" they blame.

God help the African or South American nation guilty of trying to repatriate stolen land from U.S. investment companies destroying their forests to grow coffee or chocolate. We illegally fish off the coasts of Somalia and call the irate nationalist saps "pirates". We set up factories in Indonesia and Pakistan, provide inhuman working conditions for cheap peasant and child labor to produce chotchky for our suburban cravings, hiding the profits from the taxman by investing in man-made islands off the newest billionaire playground known as Kuwait. These corporate vampires push and pull American military and diplomatic forces around the globe with unprecedented arrogance, while palming taxes desperately needed to fund the very armies they hide behind. Back home they use their media resources to keep the general population needing the unnecessary, believing the dream and suspecting anyone who dissents. Its all so beautifully sinister.

The population of Guantanamo prison numbers about 300 prisoners at the time I write this. This is down from its highest number of 680 back in 2003. The prisoners at this facility were represented by the Bush administration as the most dangerous suspects in the Nation's war on global terror. The American public has watched and read the Press wring their hands over control of the two contradictory attitudes toward the Bush government's explanation of the situation. American citizens who choose to believe the reports supporting the Country's behavior during the war equate their support to a quasi-religious framework of “loyalty to Country” and bitterly defend the sacrifices made against reason to a higher plane of "faith-based" patriotism. Common sense tells us, they argue, that these backward people who threaten America have no motive outside jealousy of our standard of living; our superiority. They are hyenas in the campsite and nothing more. FOX news and the Wall Street Journal are the most accessible of these media outlets.

Some Right-wing, Conservative talking-points are:

- Osama Bin Laden and Al Qaeda worked with the Iraqi government of Saddam Hussein to plan and execute the attacks on September 11.
- Proof of Hussein's preparation for more attacks were unveiled by a collection of spy-satellite photographs clearly showing a cache of missile body tubes. Colin Powell, United States Ambassador to the U.N. used these photos in one last pitch to the international community to defend our imminent invasion of Iraq.
- Collaborating chatter on the spy networks supported this claim with evidence of a uranium purchase by Saddam from Nigeria.
- The International community overwhelmingly supports our right to defend ourselves. Those foreigners who don't like it are not worth kissing up to anyway.
- Sleeper cells of Al Qaeda terrorists were assimilated into communities across the Unites States, waiting for instructions to engage in deadly operations against our softest underbelly. American Muslims are to be regarded with a healthy suspicion.
- No one is detained in Guantanamo who doesn't belong there. They are prisoners in our struggle to defend our homes and way of life.
- Anything done by the Administration in the service of this cause is justifiable. As mere citizens, ours is not the place to force those in the position of protecting us, The Bush White House, to reveal sensitive, motivating information supporting the retraction of Constitutional rights.
- Investigations into these "abuses" is anti-American.

The other side of the media, the so-called "liberals", challenged every one of these points. The New York Times and MSNBC television are best associated with these efforts. It is a curious phenomenon that in spite of the strong evidence disproving every itemized talking point listed above, these two groups, rather than gravitating closer to consensus, have instead drifted ideologically, further apart. We can witness this venom over the Iraq war spill into the current Healthcare debate. A simple talk to school children on the importance of staying in school and avoiding drug use has been vocally challenged by "concerned" parents who fear the President is over reaching his authority by speaking on education. "Just say No" to Obama.

The scorecard :
- No link between Osama Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein existed. To the contrary, they despised each other. However thanks to the American invasion into Iraq, Al Qaeda cells have since been welcomed into the country.
- The aluminum "tubes" in the satellite photos were proven to be incompatible for use in the development, let alone manufacture of missiles. This was known by high level Administration officials before they allowed Ambassador Powell to make his presentation, and an ass of himself, to the United Nations.
- There was no uranium in Nigeria. The punishment for discovering this information was the sordid betrayal of ambassador Joseph Wilson IVth, by top level White House personnel (Scooter Libby), by exposing his wife Valarie Plame Wilson's identity as a CIA agent.
- Aside from Great Britain, I believe our only other ally in the Iraqi war was a biker gang from the Seychelles Islands. Incidentally, public outcry in Britain against the war eventually cost Tony Blair his job.
- Sleeper cells have had a decade to surface. As such, episodes of foreign terrorist activities during this period remain dwarfed by the numbers and scope of "homegrown" terrorist organizations in the same period. Terrorists are terrorists. Muslims are Muslims. Like any subset of the whole population, there are occasions for an individual to be both. The "internship" approach to this matter embarrassed us during World War II and exposed a racist streak in the highest corridors of power. I respond only to the call by the Muslim population in my community to reject such gross associations as the result of intolerance and ignorance of the tenets of the Koran; accepting that no spiritual or political denomination is without its lunatic fringe.

The ubiquitous Right-wing, conservative deluge of meticulously scripted quasi-information and the consequent, carefully cultivated public tensions merely greased the rails of the Bush Administration's earliest experiments in the strange field of "disclosure". The White House, unable to resist an opportunity to switch a bishop for a pawn during a national "bathroom break", illegally eavesdropped on American telephone conversations. Miscalculating the press, a proactive attempt to come clean was met with unanticipated venom. The so-named "Domestic Spying Program" was forced back into the shadows, but not before a symbolic yet effective pardon for AT&T and Verizon for their collaboration; or as Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Patrick Leahey would describe it, the Bush White House wants "to immunize past illegal conduct . . because they know it was illegal conduct."
So much more needs to be said about this subject, but not at this time; I want to remain on topic and address your concerns about the treatment by the current Attorney General's office of Armed Service personnel with respect to charges of war-time abuses of prisoners at Guantanamo over the previous eight years.

- On the subject of Guantanamo:
When “Someone” claims a crime was committed at Gitmo, that “Someone” must be prepared to enter into an enigma of conflicting truths all held to be of simultaneous authority. The invasion of a country to round up "enemy combatants" is neither the same thing as declaring war upon a sovereign nation and taking enemy prisoners, nor is it arranging through diplomatic means the extradition of known criminals taking refuge on foreign soil. As I have come to learn over the past eight years it is something else entirely.
In this new War on Terrorism, then Attorney General Alberto Gonzales advised the Bush team to dispose of both Miranda and the Geneva convention. Should the press shout "Miranda!", Rumsfeld would simply answer "War!". If on the other hand some liberal International-Law professor from Columbia University should grab the Op-Ed page in the Times and yell "Geneva Convention", Cheney would just yell "This ain't a war, so these guys ain't covered!"

Its really insulting that these guys would use the same strategy to screw up the the Human Rights issue that they used to screw up the first six and a half years of their military invasion. What a waste of lives, money and sirloin diplomatic leverage. Men like these cannot be wholly faulted however. I firmly believe in G. W.'s commitment to protecting the United States from terrorists. I've just learned through this experience however, that his America and my America are on separate plains of consciousness. His definition of a "terrorist" would include the liberal media, the left wing activists and Independent scrutinizers dissatisfied with his policies. I don't believe those men in the White House during the first eight years of the 21st century had a clue as to how one might begin to accomplish the same task within the boundaries of U.S. and International Law. Pretending to save the public from the ugly truth was and is "double-speak" for an Ivy League class of frat boys who'd never consider entering a contest without hedging it with a fix. As the scorpion said to the fresh stung Fox, "It is my nature."

So without Miranda, Abdul Rahim Abdul, recently released for insufficient evidence of ties to any terrorist activity, was sent to Guantanamo for six and a half years. Like his colleagues, Abdul enjoyed the twenty hour flight in arm and leg irons, a strong dose of sedatives and a hood. I don’t believe there was a movie on that flight. I urge you to research this man's story by following the URL: http://www.upi.com/Top_News/2009/06/23/Judge-orders-Gitmo-detainees-release/UPI-86661245766496/

Rewards for information leading to the capture of suspected Al Qaeda terrorist's became a lucrative source of income for other unscrupulous informants. A large number of civil disputes were resolved by simply using the U.S. military to arrest and detain civilians whose only crime was a disagreement with a neighbor, one who related a fabricated history of insurgent complicity, collected his reward and went home with one less pain in the ass to worry about. In this way many detainees were abducted from their innocent lives back in Iraq or Afghanistan to spend years in a cell half way around the world. Proof of innocence is near impossible when the chain of command has no clear idea how to orchestrate a trial.

Salahidin Abdulahat, one of seventeen detainees from the Uyghur’s community in western China, a Muslim worshipping ethnic minority persecuted by the Chinese government for years, spent close to seven years in Guantanamo before the Obama administration finally ended the gridlocked details of his release. After years of CIA-style interrogation, Salahidin is a valuable encyclopedia of U. S. covert information:
- What were their points of interest?
- What were their methods?
- Who was in there with you?
Releasing him back home was not a humanitarian option. Obama understood repatriation would have been a death sentence as the Government of Hu Jintao will have him executed for membership in the Uyghur’s resistance effort.
So he spends his life now in permanent exile in Bermuda. Another fine mess. Jealous FOX news pundits are having a field day.

After arriving to Camp X-Ray (aka: Camp Iguana or Guantanamo), barefoot detainees are escorted along coarse stone paths from one cage to the next where they pass the time in a crouched kneeling position, waiting for a medical exam and processing. Then the fun begins.

- Prolonged Isolation
- Prolonged sleep deprivation
- Sensory deprivation
- Stress positions
- Sensory bombardment (lights, noise . .)
- Forced nakedness
- Sexual humiliation (women guards are employed here)
- cultural humiliation (flush a Koran in the toilet)
- Extreme cold (hypothermia)
- Exploitation of phobias (how about being buried alive?)
- Water-boarding (near drowning)

The Third Geneva Convention guarantees humane treatment to prisoners of War and their release after the war’s end. The Geneva Convention also restricts a prisoner’s responsibility of disclosure to name, rank and serial number. In a memo released in December of 2002, Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld approved the use of “aggressive techniques” during these interrogations, convinced in the preeminence of the United States Justice system before some Silly, Toothless Paper from Switzerland . It was also declared at this time that the Third Geneva Convention did not apply to al-Qaeda or Taliban prisoners. This was quite a shock to our NATO allies who maintain and recognize the authority of due-process under that Silly, Toothless Rag, which restricted such heavy handed interpretation to an International Tribunal. It was apparent that the United States had an independent agenda and was going to provide any anemic legal foundations for an “unconventional” approach to an “unconventional” war, regardless of the damage to international and domestic relationships or policies.

Our own Forth Amendment prohibits unwarranted searches and seizure with a conscience toward the tyrannical abuses endured by the shapers of our Constitution. They did after all, lest we continue to forget, experience their very own “9/11“.

The Sixth Amendment is pretty clear on a few other points: “ . . . the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the State and district wherein the crime shall have been committed . . And to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the assistance of Counsel for his defense.”

It took the nightmare two World Wars and the devastation of half of Europe and Japan to get a group of the most powerful nations to collect the wisdom necessary to draft that paper in Geneva. It held no partisan advantage but defended instead the principles of “all” humanity against such storms as brought about in the madness of war. Likewise, our pretense to defend, protect and spread the principles of American democracy against Terrorism, by engaging in the tactics of Orwellian tyranny is as short sighted as it is blatantly sanctimonious. Are we illustrating any such altruism through these extraordinary renditions, unwarranted invasions, unsubstantiated arrests, torture tactics, warrantless domestic wire taps, or sanctions on nations brave and insubordinate enough to betray American loyalty and ratify the proposed International Criminal Court ?

Our behavior clearly tells the world instead that when a situation challenges the basic, fundamentals of “homeland security“, the United States has lost confidence in its own Constitution as a reference for effective protection and control . The same has been publicly stated about the Bush administration’s lack regard for the International code of cooperation and civility. Our own Ninth Circuit Court ruled on December 18th, 2003 that the Executive Branch may not indefinitely imprison foreign nationals at Guantanamo without charge or a means to challenge their detention. Apparently the Federal courts must re-audition for relevance in a post-9/11 society. It is now the eleventh day of September, six years after this ruling and over three hundred detainees still wait in their six by eight foot cells for the decision of the 9th Circuit Court to reach the White House.

When such behavior is thrust onto center stage before a troubled world, it behooves the Nation to define with equal clarity and emphasis this New World Order. Failure to do so would simply confirm the vulgarity of this fresh arrangement and neutralize the effectiveness of the very code of law we claim to defend. The failure of the Bush White House to convince its skeptics was the price of maintaining its grip on our flag’s hem as it worked to deconstruct the government and society it stands for. I cannot see the logic in this without introducing motives, sub-textual agendas, that have yet to be disclosed. If your job is to protect the United States and the situation dictates the use of methods clearly restricted by the Constitution, than serve it up for what it is. Having the Country eat its vegetables by hiding them under gravy, by lying about the vegetable truth of their being, by insulting our intelligence and denying our right to the full equation for our best interests deserves less allegiance than the obediant, spoon fed conservative movement has demanded. Questioning such recklessness has been successfully sold to many patriotic Americans as counter productive and bad form. To this claim I add that America has adopted a process which allows a majority of its citizens to choose a King if it pleases. I regret only that I had to live in the age where this situation would be tested.

The recent interest in prisoner abuses during our past eight years of operations in Iraq and Afghanistan have agitated America’s patriots once again. This may well be the most effective program the AMA has yet witnessed to get overweight Americans to put down the remote, get off the couch and drive their outsized SUV’s to join fellow pharisaic patriots in the town square for a brief, loud protest rally. Attorney General Eric Holder has apparently misplaced the memo from his predecessor to overlook such indiscrete and enthusiastic inquisition. Its simply time to remind this insolent man who’s fighting and for what. Treat the terrorists like people and you disgrace the memory of Nine-eleven. Treat the detainees like convicted Terrorists and you have order. Treat some of the brave men and women in uniform like suspects and you disgrace that “last true measure of devotion.” This is exactly why broad classifications are so useful in debate. They include the sword onto which rebuttals must fall or lose integrity. Unkle Remus gave us a tar baby for Brer Rabit to wrestle; Bush gave us a war that is fought by brave soldiers on our side and “enemy combatants” on the other.

The investigation will fail. In 2004, the Justice department set up an examination into nineteen instances of possible CIA abuses. In spite of the authorization by top level officials to broaden our interpretation of allowable interrogation techniques, parameters limiting these practices only from the very threshold of death, it has been suggested that some CIA interrogators found even this latitude prohibitively restrictive.

Some examples of this claim include:
- the agent who used a gun to intimidate a suspect
- Threats by interrogators to bury their subjects alive
- the agent who received 8 years in prison for beating a detainee to death with a flashlight during “harsh interrogation”
- The undercover agent who received a promotion to Chief of Station in Baghdad after stripping a prisoner, dousing him with water and leaving him in a frigid cell overnight in Kabul, where he was found dead the following morning of hypothermia. (I don’t believe this worked to free any new information in the War on Terrorism)
- The Afghan prisoner who died of asphyxiation after being suspended by chains wrapped around his arms, forced behind his back. No one was convicted on this one.
- The agents who disregarded instructions from the Justice Department authorizing water-boarding with the warning that “the repetitions should not be substantial because the techniques generally lose their effectiveness after several repetitions.” Abu Zubaydah was water-boarded 83 times in August 2002; Kalid Shaikh Mohammad was water-boarded 183 times in March, 2003. (Kalid Mohammad was the self-proclaimed mastermind of the September 11 attacks.)

Additional hurdles confronting efforts to bring specific individuals out from the cover of patriotic duty and into the light of sanity, exposing them for the submissive, sadistic vigilantes they proved to be and sentenced accordingly, will be met and neutered by impossibly difficult metrics of accountability. According to U.S. anti-torture statutes, to convict someone of torture, the prosecution must establish that an interrogator intended to inflict “severe physical pain or mental suffering.” Proving this much to the satisfaction of the court and jury will prove more than difficult. Without witnesses or substantiating medical documentation such as autopsy reports or physicals, evidence unavailable to prosecutors who lost these same cases between 2002 and ‘06, cases that were ultimately rejected by the Bush Justice system, this second attempt doesn’t stand a chance. So you can all relax. After all, we “can’t handle the truth” anyway.

However by opening this inquiry the Obama Administration begins a period of long overdue therapy for a nation traumatized and divided by the malignant strategies of the previous government. Taking the Constitution off of life-support, letting it stretch its legs and walk on its own again is just the prescription our country needs to finish the job in Afghanistan and get back to problems here at home. And nobody loses.

The “Patriots” who defend America’s right to lynch foreigners on the closest limb will feel vindicated by Eric Holder’s high profile loss. This will allow them to get back to other issues like stopping the communists from passing a bill on Healthcare and closing the gates of America from brown skinned immigrants. The Liberals, who will continue to trash the White House’s menacing manipulation of the legal system, will have some short-lived satisfaction from their long awaited day in court before complaining that the inevitable decision to dismiss was sold to Right-wing lobbyists before the trials began. The world will be happy to welcome home a sorely missed multi-lateral business partner and NATO ally after eight long years of fever.

We as a nation have learned that we are no safer by amputating the Constitution. We simply lost some time, a great deal of diplomatic leverage and many young soldiers in the Middle East and Asia. As they say in Afghanistan, “American’s think in years, we think in generations.” If patience is the key to success here, I'm concerned that we had better figure out how to read Arabic.

- jeff

© Jeff Thomas 2009